The coveted trait of empathy has now become a rarity in friendships and relationships in the 21st century.  Having someone’s back, following girl code, helping a loved one on a hard day or going the extra mile for another person is considered a miracle as people are forgetting the importance of sympathy. The world is beginning to lack the most important skill of all: emotional intelligence. 

Emotional intelligence can be defined in many ways. In a dictionary it is the capacity to be aware of, control, and express one’s emotions and to handle relationships empathetically. However, each person has their own individual definition of the term. These definitions can also change depending on the situation whether it’s in a friendship, relationship or connection with oneself. Although each person has their own way to define the term and can read it in a dictionary, the recognition of the importance of emotional intelligence is beginning to dwindle.  

 In the modern age of technology the world has recentered its focus on what other people think of them online instead of in person. Emotional intelligence should be held to a higher standard than intellectual intelligence. Researchers at NCBI have found that emotional intelligence is equal to or much more important than a person’s I.Q. They have also found that people who have developed their ability to use their emotions in positive ways are able to navigate their own as well as others feelings more effectively and accurately. 

A person with a high aptitude of emotional intelligence can come in many forms. Like school and sports, being comfortable with one’s emotions takes time and practice. It can start with little things, for example recognizing when another person is having a hard day and complimenting them to give them a little rush of happiness and ability to see hope. The most difficult but essential part of understanding emotions, is being able to recognize when an individual is in the wrong. People struggle with apologizing, but being able to do this proves that one can comprehend when they have done something wrong that hurts another. 

Emotional intelligence improves the way one interacts with the world. Being comfortable with both bad and good days also allows for a more positive lifestyle. According to research done at the University of Northern Iowa, a person’s emotional intelligence impacts other aspects of life because of its impact on motivation, decision making and self-awareness. Being able to navigate feelings encourages a person to be a stronger worker as well as leader because they know their limits and can keep themselves going. 

Mastery of the skills that come with being highly emotionally intelligent are easy to master, but it does take work. These can be skills as simple as being able to realize that one’s actions impact others or not doing something that will hurt another. The most important skill of all is leading with empathy. These easy things become doable when a person stops caring more about what people think of them on social media and care more about their in-person actions. Being emotionally intelligent is far more beneficial than being the smartest person in the room or having the most followers on Instagram.